Some people hear romanticizing motherhood and think it means pretending things are perfect. Soft music, spotless homes, glowing skin, kids who never argue, and a mom who never loses her cool.
Yeah… no. That’s not what I’m doing over here.
My version of romanticizing motherhood is rooted in realism, healing, and intention. It’s about choosing softness inside the chaos. It’s about deciding that joy doesn’t need permission, a milestone, or a future version of me who’s “less tired” or “more put together.”
It’s about loving where I am now—even as an anxious African mom still figuring things out.
The Hotel Vibe I Gave Myself (Because Why Not?)
One of my favorite little upgrades lately?
I added a Nespresso machine to my bedroom.
Yes. My bedroom.
There’s something deeply grounding about making coffee before the day officially starts—before the kids are up, before anyone needs me, before the noise. It instantly gives hotel vibes, and honestly, that alone makes the morning feel more intentional.
Right now, my go-to pod is Nespresso Stormio, Dark Roast Coffee. It’s bold, smooth, and comforting in a way that feels perfect for slow mornings when I’m easing into the day instead of rushing it. It’s the kind of coffee that makes you want to sit for an extra minute and actually enjoy the quiet.
If you’re curious, this is the one I’m loving lately:
👉 Nespresso Stormio, Dark Roast Coffee: https://amzn.to/4r8CX68
That one small choice—bringing the coffee to my bedroom instead of dragging myself downstairs—has completely shifted my mornings from survive to savor. And that’s really what romanticizing motherhood looks like for me: choosing ease where I can.
Skincare as Me-Time, Not a Chore
Skincare used to feel like something I rushed through at the end of a long day. Now, it’s one of the few moments that belongs fully to me.
Ten minutes in the morning.
Ten minutes at night.
That’s it—but I protect that time.
Lately, I’ve been double cleansing, and it’s become one of my favorite parts of my routine. I start with the SkinCeuticals Simply Clean Cleansing Gel (I picked mine up from Blue Mercury), followed by the M-61 PowerGlow Cleanser. Together, they leave my skin feeling clean but not stripped—fresh, calm, and ready for the rest of my routine.
If you’re curious, this is the second cleanser I’m using right now:
👉 M-61 PowerGlow Cleanser: https://amzn.to/49QDjqO
In the mornings, I’ve added the Timeless Vitamin C Serum, and honestly? I’m loving the results so far. My skin looks brighter and more even, and it feels like one of those small changes that actually delivers.
👉 Timeless Vitamin C Serum: https://amzn.to/46ayBmP
I always finish my morning routine with SPF—non-negotiable. Right now, I rotate between Anua SPF 50 and Supergoop Unseen Sunscreen, depending on the day and how my skin is feeling.
👉 Supergoop Unseen Sunscreen: https://amzn.to/4t0fNRi
Using products that feel a little luxe—beautiful textures, thoughtful formulas—has completely changed how I experience these moments. It’s no longer just skincare. It’s a ritual. A pause. A reminder that tending to myself matters just as much as tending to everyone else.
Turning My Bathroom Into a Mini Spa
A couple times a week, I slow everything down and turn my bath routine into a full reset. Warm water. Candles. No multitasking. No rushing to the next thing.
One of my absolute favorites right now is the OSEA body wash. It smells incredible, feels nourishing, and instantly gives spa-level vibes from the comfort of my own bathroom. It’s one of those products that makes the whole experience feel elevated—like I’m treating my body with the same care I give my face.
👉 OSEA Body Wash: https://amzn.to/4a5DvE5
And then come the body scrubs—because this is where the spa energy really kicks in.
When I want that true, luxurious exfoliation moment, I reach for OSEA Salts of the Earth. It’s mineral-rich, grounding, and leaves my skin feeling smooth, soft, and deeply cared for. This is my slow bath, deep exhale scrub.
👉 OSEA Salts of the Earth Body Scrub: https://amzn.to/4bMvEMQ
On days when I want something a little more energizing, I use the OUAI St. Barts Scalp & Body Scrub. The scent alone feels like a mini vacation, and I love that I can use it from head to toe. It’s refreshing, effective, and makes the whole shower feel intentional instead of rushed.
👉 OUAI St. Barts Scalp & Body Scrub: https://amzn.to/4k0UwCY
Now, real talk—OSEA is a splurge. If the price point gives you pause, I’ve already done the work for you. I used AI to compare ingredients and find OSEA dupes that deliver similar results for less.
👉 Read: Best OSEA Dupes (Ingredient-by-Ingredient Comparison)
https://anxiousafricanmom.com/2025/12/02/best-osea-dupes-how-i-used-ai-to-compare-every-ingredient/
Romanticizing motherhood isn’t about overspending—it’s about intention. Whether it’s the original or a dupe, the goal is the same: creating small rituals that help your nervous system soften and your body feel cared for.
Midday Lunch Dates > Everything
One of the quiet joys my husband and I prioritize is a lunch date on our work-from-home days.
No babysitter. No elaborate planning. Just us stepping away from screens, eating together, talking like adults who actually like each other (important 😅).
It’s a reminder that our relationship matters too—not just the logistics of parenting. These small check-ins keep us connected in a season that can easily turn into ships passing in the night.
Choosing Calm Over “Resale Value”
I’ve also slowly—but very intentionally—turned my home into a place that feels calm to me.
That means paint colors that may not be “next buyer friendly.”
That means design choices that prioritize mood over trends.
That means creating rooms that regulate my nervous system.
For a long time, I held back. I told myself I’d wait. Wait until the kids were older. Wait until we moved. Wait until it made more sense.
I’m done waiting.
Loving Where I Am—Right Now
This season taught me something important: postponing joy doesn’t make life easier. It just delays your own peace.
Romanticizing motherhood, for me, isn’t about aesthetics for the internet. It’s about building moments that make the everyday feel softer. It’s about deciding that this life—with all its noise, anxiety, beauty, and imperfection—is worthy of care and enjoyment right now.
Not later.
Not when things slow down.
Now.
And if you’re an anxious mom reading this, especially a first-gen mom carrying more than most people see—please know this: you’re allowed to make your life feel good. You don’t need permission. You don’t need to justify it.
Start small. Start where you are. Romanticize that. 🤍
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